We live in a litigious society. People will attempt to sue for ANYTHING. Even delusional prisoners with too much access to the internet. Case in point, Jonathon Lee Riches, incarcerated for wire fraud has picked up a fun little habit. He sues public figures. Oh but wait until you read what he’s accusing them of. A few outtakes:
“Carmelo Anthony told me he is going to kill me…I was his former boyfriend and we were in a sexual relationship in 2000…I used stolen credit cards to get him GNC vitamins and enemas to flush out his toxins.”
“Anthony melt my Popsicle. Anthony gave me a STD in 2001. Carmelo Anthony worked as a undercover narcotic cop in Baltimore and was snitchin.”
“Carmelo Anthony cheated on his wife LaLa with Dwyane Wade’s ex-wife who gave Anthony fellatio in I-95 traffic.”
“Mark Cuban stole my credit cards and tried to buy the Texas Rangers with my money. Mark Cuban assaulted me serving ice cream at Dairy Queen.”
“Jerry Buss accused me of raping him and Kobe Bryant in Boulder at JonBenet Ramsey’s house. Jerry Buss sold me Jeannie Buss on eBay and I was promised a Lakers janitor job when I get out of prison for less than minimum wage.”
Woooowwwww how do these things make it through our legal system? Your tax dollars at work!
Want to check out the whole thing (oh and it’s handwritten as well) go HERE