Is Gabrielle Union blaming herself for Dwyane Wade’s cheating?

Gabrielle Union has been promoting her new BET show, “Being Mary Jane.” The show premiered this week landing the spot as the number one debut cable show for the 2013-2014 season with 5 million viewers. The timing of the new show comes on the heels of two announcements from Gabby and her boo, Dwyane Wade. First their engagement announcement and then, the breaking news that DWade fathered another son while the couple was on an imaginary “break.”

In a recent interview in Glamour, Gabby gave her do’s and don’ts for relationships. She also revealed that her work schedule last year – she was shooting BMJ in Atlanta from January to about March then headed to Vegas to film “Think Like a Man 2” – is what caused the distance in her relationship with DWade.

DO forget your “type.” It worked for me. When I met Dwyane, his “résumé” looked like crap: athlete, going through a divorce, nine years younger than me. None of that screamed, “Let’s have a lasting relationship.” Then, after I had a heart-crushing breakup with yet another immature jerk, I thought, it can’t be any worse if I date a fetus. Let’s just see what happens. Turned out he’d been on his own since he was 15. He had wisdom that comes with facing an insane amount of adversity. He’s sweet, funny, honest about his shortcomings. When I put my preconceived notions to the side, I found someone cool.

DON’T put up with a friend-versus-boyfriend tug-of-war. Some friends act possessive and say, “You’re not spending enough time with me.” Huh? Remember when we made our vision boards and the dude was in the middle? You’re supposed to be happy for me. Thankfully, my girls are like, “High-five!” And D likes to be around them too. If there’s weirdness, either something’s wrong with the friends—or the boy. Investigate. And sift accordingly.

DO show him your feelings. Daily. Dwyane generally gets up before I do to go to the gym, and he’s never left without kissing me and telling me he loves me. As for me, I am complimentary to the point where I am almost a little Chester the Molester-y. I think he’s so delicious. Watching him get out of the shower never gets old. Never. It’s not like he ever wonders what I’m thinking, but usually he’s thinking, She needs a cold shower!

DON’T write off an ex (or get back together) without really thinking it through. When you’re debating whether to go backward or forward, you have to look at the original issue. [When Dwyane and I broke up briefly in 2013], it was because of distance and scheduling. I finished filming the show, then I flew to Vegas right away to start shooting Think Like a Man Too. I couldn’t take time off, and I missed some quality togetherness we desperately needed. Over the summer, I reassessed priorities. I’d always wanted an awesome career with back-to-back projects, but I realized I wasn’t willing to sacrifice my relationship for it. Moving forward, I decided my work schedule has to make sense for our family. Bottom line: If an issue’s a deal breaker, it’s a deal breaker. If your relationship isn’t something you’re willing to give up and you can compromise, do so.

The crazy thing about this is some feel that Gabby is saying it’s HER FAULT that Dwyane got Aja pregnant. I disagree with this position. Acknowledging that work demands can cause distance – as if athletes aren’t on the road a great portion of the year themselves – doesn’t mean self blame.

The most interesting development about all of this, Gabby is taking the brunt of the hostility for DWade having an outside baby. I hope she’s strong enough to make it through this storm. The paps caught Gabby at LAX Wednesday night and asked her if she was ready to be a step mom to baby Xaiver. She didn’t look like she enjoyed that question.